It's a dating myth that the more physically attractive you are to a man, the more a man will want you in his life. THE REAL TRUTH IS;
The less you care about how physically attractive you are to a man, the more a man will want you in his life.
How much does the way you look matter to you? Do you want to make men crazy with desire for you? Your appearance may initially attract a man to you, but it won't guarantee he'll stick around. There are many beautiful, single women who aren't in a relationship and find it difficult to find a man who wants to commit to them exclusively, and the reason is this: Men are attracted emotionally to women who do not care how physically attractive a man thinks they look
Women who need attention and praise from a man to feel beautiful are women men do not pursue for anything other than sexual fulfillment. So why then, do men seem so obsessed with how attractive a woman is and stare at attractive women all the time? Why do men seem so obsessed with a woman's appearance?
It's one of the ironies of the male/female dynamic that men love to look at and desire beautiful women, but are turned off "emotionally" to women who need to be desired for their beauty. A man responds to an attractive woman sexually and physically, but he does not see her as "relationship material" when she acts like she needs to be desired physically in order to feel good about herself. A man can sense this kind of neediness from a woman and he will run the other way fast - he may have sex with her first, but he will run away.
A man is attracted emotionally to a woman who either 1) feels good about herself and how she looks regardless of whether a man finds her attractive or 2) feels bad about herself and how she looks regardless of whether a man finds her attractive.
The first type of woman is someone who feels beautiful and loves herself regardless of whether a man is in her life. When a man does come into her life and she starts dating him, she enjoys being adored by him, but his attraction to her does not change how she feels about herself. She does not need a man in her life to feel attractive.
The 2nd type of woman feels she is unattractive and dislikes her appearance and most likely herself, but has a man in her life who loves and adores her physically. How the man feels about her physically has no impact on her opinion of herself. She feels this way whether or not a man exists in her life. Many men find this kind of woman emotionally appealing to be with as well. They feel comfortable with a woman like this because they usually remind them of the relationship they had with their own mother? a woman who was very hard to please; always saw the negative side of life; and was unhappy with herself regardless of how much she was loved and desired by her husband.
If you are not one of these 2 types of women, you are probably having difficulty finding "Mr. Right". That is because you feel unattractive and worthless unless a man is in your life desiring you physically and giving you attention. If you do not feel good about yourself without a man in your life, you are destined to have relationship problems. You may be very attractive, dress in gorgeous clothes, have beautiful hair, work out and always look good; but without the attention of a man you feel ugly and worthless inside. This lack of self esteem is sensed by the men you date and it makes them see you as someone they only want to have physical relationships with.
Women who have this kind of emptiness inside were usually raised by a mother who focused obsessively on their appearance and were very critical of how they looked. Mothers like this had mothers who treated them this way as well. They target their pretty, adorable daughter with criticism about their appearance and resent their daughter for the praise and attention she receives from her father, family and friends. This attention makes the mother feel threatened, and she constantly focuses critically attention on her daughter's appearance to show her resentment and release her insecurity, never offering her daughter the acceptance of unconditional love and affection.
These female children grow up needing the attention and love of a man to feel attractive, because feeling attractive to a man is the only way they feel worthwhile as a person. Men sense this kind of neediness from a woman and they never stay in relationships with them for very long. They will use this woman for sexual fulfillment, but will rarely consider them for a serious, committed relationship.
I was this kind of woman for many years of my life. It took me the realization of believing that my own opinion of myself is all that really matters to me in my life. I can now say that my sense of self worth is no longer wrapped up in how attractive I am to a man. Believe me, I adore being attractive to my boyfriend, but how he feels about the way I look has no bearing on how beautiful I feel I am. My focus is not on being sexually appealing to him by dressing seductively; it is being attractive because I feel I am attractive. That is because my sense of self worth comes from my own sense of being special as a person.
It's important as women to realize that the superficial attraction our physical appearance has with men will only start the initial attraction process. Emotional attraction is what keeps a man interested in dating a woman and falling in love with her, not physical attraction
Your appearance, and how much you need a man to be attracted to you to feel good about yourself, will determine if his emotional attraction to you grows. If you are having problems finding Mr. Right and you are attractive, look at how you relate to the men you meet. Your looks may open the door, but how you feel about yourself and what expectations you have from a man, will determine whether or not that door stays open. If you need a man to make you feel attractive and worthwhile in order to feel good about yourself, you will never find an emotionally fulfilling relationship with a man in your life, and will only find men who offer you unfulfilling sexual relationships based on their wanting someone to "adorn them".Self Esteem
If you are a woman who needs a man to physically and sexually desire you, then you have issues with self love due to low self esteem. If you do not have self esteem, you cannot have self love. When a mother raises her daughter with competition and constant criticism, and controls the kind of interaction she has with her father, her daughter grows up lacking self esteem. Without self esteem, a woman will use other people to make her feel good about her life. She will use a man's interest in her body to feel worthwhile. Realizing how much your upbringing affects your lack of self esteem is an essential step towards reclaiming your self esteem. Your knowledge is your power. When you understand why you believe what you believe and why you act the way you act with the men in your life, you can begin to change your attitude towards yourself and the men you date. When you show men that you live your life true to what matters to you, without using them to fill an old childhood need, your self esteem will exist. And when self esteem exists, self love follows. The best way to feel self love is to live your life by your truth and cater to what you need for your own happiness in life. "Finding Your Truth" gives you insight into focusing on living your life authentically and finding your path towards self love.
THE REAL TRUTH: The less you care about whether your "physical attraction" makes a man want to be with you, the more a man will be emotionally attracted to you and the sooner you will find love.
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