In this day and age, we're surrounded by the love we see in romantic movies and reality TV shows. But these ideas of true love aren't just fantasies, they do exist in real life. For some ladies, however, finding the perfect man can be a life-long struggle, and even though it can take a while, kissing Mr Wrong can lead you one step closer to finding Mr Right.
According to Tala Scott, founder of Evolve Today, relationship expert and author, there are seven men every woman will meet in her quest to find the Divine Union – her perfect match. In her years of studying relationships, Tala teaches women everything she has learnt about the new formula for love in her new book "Heaven on Earth Begins: The Seven Stages of Love." Here are the seven men that will build you up to finding the purest of loves – Mr Darcy.
1. Mr Grey: Ah yes, we've all fallen for the infamous Mr Grey. He wants you close enough to exercise control, but never closer than arms length emotionally. His intrigue is a product of being emotionally distant, and he still carries the baggage of his first heart break. Don't think you can change him! Love should not be difficult.
2. Mr McDreamy: Meeting someone that feels like your soul-mate is a fulfilling and beautiful experience. This loving relationship based on care and mutual understanding arms you with the tools and knowledge of how to love. If this intense connection doesn't evolve into The Divine Relationship, it will teach you a lesson about self-mastery and inner confidence.
3. Mr Unavailable: This relationship has a deep love that is required in the Divine Relationship, but there is something missing. Mr Unavailable can't offer you one or more of these connections: heart, body, soul and mind. This relationship isn't a complete, full love. This man is emotionally, mentally or physically unavailable.
4. Mr Upgrade: Mr Upgrade has a strong connection to your soul and an even better understanding of the real you. There is a spiritual magnetism to your relationship, and an attraction to the soul. However, this soulful attraction often can't translate due to a unhealed past relationship that will interfere with your intimate connection.
5. Mr Variety: Mr Variety, a.k.a. the ladies man, is the charming centre of attention that can't seem to keep his eyes on one girl! This heartthrob will be in and out of your life in a flash once the connection gets too intense for him, leaving you burning for more and wondering what went wrong.
6. Mr Duality: Mr Duality is your twin in terms of your values, thoughts and strengths, with a deep sense of care and protection in your relationship. There is always some sort of difficulty when it comes to entering a committed relationship, and it is often due to unrequited romantic love.
7. Mr Darcy: Your search is over when you meet your love of a lifetime, Mr Darcy. The love is complete in the heart, body, soul and mind, and the love is unconditional. He sees nothing but perfection and beauty in you and makes you see it in yourself too. This Divine Union Relationship shows you how easy true love can really be!
"During my years of research, I've discovered that loving and being loved is the key to our long-term happiness. Unless we begin educating women about the NEW formula for love, they will keep repeating the same limiting patterns and attract relationships that break-down with devastating heart-break to themselves and their families. True love really does exist. It is time for women to take a leap of faith now that they can have access to this guide book. The magic of love is something we all deserve to have, so go find your Mr Darcy!" says Tala.
Tala's book Heaven on Earth Begins: The Seven Stages of Love is currently available to purchase at www.amazon.com
RRP: $17.99 (soft cover) or $5.86 (e-book).
For more information visit www.evolvetoday.com.au
Question: What originally inspired your passion for love and relationships?
Tala Scott: My own personal journey of meeting Mr Darcy inspired my passion for love and relationships. I met the love of my life – Mr Darcy when I was 29. I was married with 3 young children at the time and our meeting was totally unexpected. Mr Darcy simply walked into my life. I felt that I knew this man even though we had only just met. During the next three years, I flourished as a woman and my work productivity increased and my health was vital and strong. As our love grew, I became the best version of myself, loving, joyful and extraordinarily happy. I instinctively knew this love was sacred.
However, due to family pressure I decided to stay in my marriage and I let Mr Darcy go. During the next seven years, I endured real heart-break and the constant pain of loss. However, the growth and change I had experienced remained. As my heart healed, I felt inspired to teach as many women as possible how to find their Mr Darcy. I believe that women need to know that he exists, that he is real and that he is definitely out there in the world.
Question: Can you talk us through how you created the formula in your book Heaven on Earth Begins – The Seven Stages of Love?
Tala Scott: The formula for my book Heaven on Earth Begins originated in the collation of research I gathered from women who sought assistance to find their sacred relationship. I also went through the process of meeting the seven stages of love so that I could fully understand how to assist them.
During fifteen years of study, it became obvious that particular behavioural patterns and types of men appeared in a particular sequence leading to the Divine Union Relationship. The research indicated that a definite pattern or a formula had emerged.
It also became evident that each type of man offered valuable insight and or teaching to the women they met. Many women stay in unfulfilled relationships for varying reasons but the major one pertains to the fear of being alone. Many women who had separated or divorced were unsure if they could trust themselves to fall in love again and some women were doubtful that love actually exists. For women to heal it was important to know that there is a formula that leads to finding Mr Darcy and that it does work.
Question: Is it important to go through the Mr Wrong process to be able to find Mr Right?
Tala Scott: The answer to this question is yes. It is my belief that it is important to take this step as we learn about our authentic self in our intimate relationships. Mr Wrong teaches us the reasons why this type of relationship doesn't work and why it can't last. The relationship with Mr Wrong is not built on a solid basis of friendship. It lacks maturity and depth and it lacks growth and understanding of the heart and mind. It will teach us limiting truths until we learn to stop settling for less than we deserve. It is here that we reach inside the core of our heart to search for something deeper, to look for a more loving and fulfilling relationship with Mr Right. Mr Wrong reveals a love that is conditional, limited and exudes inequality. Experiencing Mr Wrong opens the door to finding Mr Right.
Question: How can we work on ourselves whilst we wait for Mr Right – Mr Darcy?
Tala Scott: 1. The most important step to take is to nurture and establish a great relationship with yourself. Self-love is a must. Do the things you love to do on a regular basis. It may be meditation in the morning, walking in nature, having dinner with a great friend, going to see a fantastic movie.
2. Journal your thoughts and feelings. Be aware of any limiting ideas or thoughts you may have about having a loving, healthy relationship in your life. Seek professional advice or guidance if you feel stuck, sad or unsure about what steps to take to move forward.
3. Write a list of all of your positive attributes. Write a list of the qualities you would like to nurture in yourself.
4. Pay it forward – do something selfless for another. It creates positive feelings, and opens the door to gratitude.
5. Try something new – step out of your comfort zone and do something you haven't done before. Eg. Go see a movie on your own. Keep nurturing your relationship with yourself. Take small steps.
6. Plan a spa-day with friends, have a massage or take a holiday to a destination that you love.
7. Keep your heart open and your mind receptive to love. Show kindness to others and all creatures. Your belief in love creates the opening to attracting Mr Darcy into your life.
Question: What advice do you have for women who are feeling "broken" after having recently come out of a long-term relationship?
Tala Scott: 1. Take regular walks along the beach. Scientific research has now revealed that walking on or near the water reduces anxiety and creates feelings of well-being.
2. Be really gentle with yourself. Know that healing the heart, body, soul and mind takes time. Time is what you need. Time is on your side.
3. When you feel ready, allow family and friends to help you. Allow them to cook for you and accept their loving hugs.
4. Feel your emotions and thoughts deeply. Cry and eat ice-cream if you want to and yes you can have earned that second glass of wine!
5. Talk it out, it is important not to keep feelings bottled up. Write your angry and upset thoughts on a piece of paper and then rip them up and throw them in the bin.
6. If you need to attend a family gathering and you are not ready to tell your family and friends you are now single, tell a close family member about the break-up. They will know when to steer the conversation away from sensitive topics about your previous relationship.
7. Watch a comedy. A movie will take your mind off the heart pain for a while. It is cathartic to laugh when you feel sad.
8. As difficult as it may be at this time, it is important to remember, that in time, you will love again. You ARE an extraordinary, beautiful person who will find love. Pain and suffering happens for a reason. Its gift allows us to become more fully who we truly are. How we respond and move through the experience of a heart-break will determine what happens next. Take the wisdom that now lives in your heart and use it wisely. True love never hurts, it never ends. Only limiting relationships do.
Question: Why was it important for you to relate the seven stages of love to movies and reality TV characters?
Tala Scott: As a child, watching movies on a Saturday afternoon was the time of the week we looked forward to the most. It was family time. A time of being together. Today, watching movies and reality TV is the norm. To fully understand and integrate the new teachings and strategies I reveal in my book, I wanted to find common ground with the reader. We needed a place of togetherness or common ground to begin. These characters are known to many people. They reveal the characteristics and attributes of the men portrayed in the Seven Stages of Love.
When I watched the first Bridget Jones movie and was introduced to Mr Darcy I knew that he was her Divine Union and initially I wanted to shake Brigit because she was unable to see it. She couldn't fathom that Mr Darcy loved her unconditionally. Thankfully by the third movie she was aware and they finally married. Divine Union was accomplished.
Question: How will we know when we have found our Mr Darcy?
Tala Scott: The answer to this question is really very simple. You just will! How is that possible? The connection and feelings you experience when you meet Mr Darcy is unique. You will feel as if you have met before. There is a sense of joy, happiness and excitement that's quite breathtaking. Life productivity increases, health and vitality improves and the realisation dawns that you are part of something bigger than yourself. The Divine Union connects couples at the level of heart, body, soul and mind. My research and study has indicated that this love continues to grow and expand as the years pass. It shows no signs of sliding down the slippery slope of complacency. This love provides a way of life that is truly unique. The love you find with Mr Darcy is extraordinary not ordinary.
Interview by Brooke Hunter
Photo by Christiana Rivers on Unsplash
Photo by PHUOC LE on Unsplash